Saturday, January 15, 2011

Prove it.

"The only people you need in your life are the ones that prove they need you in theirs."

I love this quote, but I find it hard to follow sometimes. Sometimes you can't choose who is or is not in your life. There are always going to be people in your life who don't prove themselves, and there are going to be those people you prove to over and over again, but fail to reciprocate.

Yesterday I got a text from a past best friend saying "I've been having the worst couple of days ever and could use a smile and you're the only one who can make me smile when i'm having a bad day." While this is nice to hear, it annoys me that people think it is okay to go weeks, months, and years without talking until they need you again. The problem is when you let someone in your life, they begin to learn your responses to different scenarios. In this case, she knew I would forget the past and just crack a couple jokes to make her laugh. Sometimes it's easier to just not bring up things that hurt us from before so then we don't have to hurt all over. So we texted a couple times and then she randomly texted me again that night saying "Goodnight. I love you. Thank you for cheering me up today." It's little moments like these where you know you were put into someone else's life for a reason. Whether they realize it right then, or years later, it still matters.

When you have an understanding of how a best friend should be, it is hard for me to drift from that. In the beginning when you constantly are saying "I'll be there no matter what," or "We'll be best friends forever," you know, something we all say constantly to each other; well I never let go of how I felt during those days. So even when something bad happens in a friendship, I constantly go back to the days where I felt like I couldn't live without that person, and then I always end up forgiving them. Most of my friends no that and often times use it against me, walk all over me just because they know I'll always be there. But as much as I hate being taken advantage of, I believe I was made that way for a reason. And one day there will be someone who won't take advantage of me. They'll prove themselves worthy of a friendship before I have to threaten it. That day will make all the days in between worth it.

I feel like it's just common sense to prove to others that you need them in your life. I think I do that pretty well, and just never understood why you wouldn't constantly be there for the people who mean the most to you. But recently I've realized most do not go about it the same way. I can tell based on who makes an effort to see me on school breaks, who stays in touch with me when I'm at school, who randomly calls or texts me other than when they just need something from me. Little things like caring make a just a friend...a BEST friend.

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